2014 Horror Part Seven

DEVIL'S DUE
Dir - Matt Bettinelli-Olpin/Tyler Gillett
Overall: MEH

Some big wigs in Hollywood took notice of the film production team Radio Silence after their top-notch closing segment in 2012's V/H/S, offering them the chance to adapt a screenplay by Lindsay Devlin in the form of Devil's Due.  Sadly, the result is an incredibly flawed, major studio produced slab of dullness.  The biggest problem is in its found footage structure.  There is absolutely no reason whatsoever that this story is told in this manner besides 20th Century Fox seeing easy dollar signs.  Usually, found footage films sort of justify an elementary reason that people are recording everything.  Here, we are given some thin at best rationalizations why a couple expecting their first baby would document mountains of expository dialog, (and then not rewind the tape to watch all the creepy shit that happened on it until eight months later), including but not limited to several doctor visits which last I checked are illegal to videotape in the first place.  Directors Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett have said that there was no point in explaining the films editing to an audience that is used to this sub-genre by now, instead saying the movie is intentionally comprised of home video and surveillance footage because....well?  Because it is trendy, pure and simple.  There are one or two effectively creepy scenes, but the forced framework, predictable and derivative story, (its Rosemary's Baby almost to a tee), obnoxious jump scares, and idiotic behavior from the main male character all join forces to sink this ship and sink it hard.

HONEYMOON
Dir - Leigh Janiak
Overall: GOOD

Hey look, its Ygritte from Game of Thrones!  In her directorial debut, Ohio-born Leigh Janiak does a bravo job with a basic setting, a grand total of four speaking characters, and an ambiguous, unsettling premise shaped around a charming enough couple on their, (you guessed it), honeymoon in the woods.  As many great horror movies are efficient at doing, the dreadfulness in Honeymoon is far more about the protagonists' suffering with each other than how many boo scares, CGI monsters, and screechy soundtrack noises the film can make.  Gradually and undoubtedly, things begin going very wrong and thankfully, our newlyweds behave compassionately and logically enough towards each other so that their plight is all the more compelling.  Both Rose Leslie and Harry Treadaway hide their Scottish and British accents pretty well, (it is a fun game to pick out when they let them slip though), and they do a superlative job as the the ill-fated couple.  Treadaway in particular does not make the mistake many other type characters in many other type movies do in that he very much seems to be seriously concerned from the word go, once the unease rears its unflattering head.  A lesser cast and a stronger reliance on genre tropes would have been detrimental here, yet thankfully such faux-pas' were successfully side-stepped.

GOODNIGHT MOMMY
Dir - Veronika Franz/Severin Fiala
Overall:  GOOD

Despite venturing into that most repugnant of sub-genres, (meaning torture porn, naturally), writer/director team Veronika Franz and Severin Fiala's Goodnight Mommy veered enough into other more admirable turf to end up being a strong bit of work.  Though it could be a little too easy to decipher before the twist is brought to the forefront, things are kept mysterious in a consistently clever way.  This is yet another one with a minuscule cast and primarily one setting that keeps things curious and just a tad uneasy before kicking it into more disturbed gear.  Depending on ones tastes and tolerance for nastiness, Goodnight Mommy rides this line to some extent, but it never got gratuitous, which is surely an asset to the film in remaining engaging first and brutal second.  There is also a minimal yet welcome sense of humor present.  Though by the end, the filmmakers were certainly going for more gasps than giggles.  The film manages to have a relatively familiar premise and still pulls the rug out from under its audience while being thoroughly creepy in a fantastical, non-supernatural way.

2017 Horror Part One

GET OUT

Dir - Jordan Peele
Overall: GOOD

Comedic actor-turned writer/director Jordan Peele's directorial debut Get Out may fall short of greatness, but he does a crackerjack job for a first swing at the horror genre.  There is thankfully only one jump scare and the tone is simultaneously dread-fueled and bizarre, with the unease fascinatingly built-up until we find out what is going on.  That is the unfortunate thing though; "until we find out what is going on", because once we do, the movie ends up stumbling towards its high-tension conclusion.  The big reveal certainly packs a WTF punch for the audience, but the large leaps in logic in order to make it all hold together, (which it does not), is the bigger issue.  Plot holes, flimsy logic, and things like expository dialog being delivered at ridiculous moments all unfortunately break verisimilitude.  This is not to mention the comic relief that while funny and enjoyable, also makes for an awkard tonal clash.  Still, it is an ingenious move to pervert liberal inclusiveness into something horrifically macabre, so even if every detail does not hold up after the initial jolt of uniqueness wares off, it is an impressive work.

A GHOST STORY

Dir - David Lowery

Overall: WOOF

 

A failed experiment by filmmaker and Milwaukee native David Lowery, (once again teaming up with actors Casey Affleck and Rooney Mara), A Ghost Story has wonderful ideas on paper that translates incredibly poorly into a movie, particularly into an hour and a half movie.  Few films try a viewers patience from the comical, irritating, confusing, and infuriating extent that this one does.  One scene in particular, (involving a chocolate pie of all things), boldly goes for grief-stricken profoundness, yet ends up being laughably ridiculous instead.  Most of all though, it is just aggressively boring.  There is a rare, long section of dialog where a random hipster rants like the world's most pompous party guest about how everything every human being will ever do in life is utterly pointless.  Which brings up the question as to whether or not that was Lowery's entire point to begin with; to make a movie that is utterly pointless.  The concept of a ghost rapidly experiencing time only to rewind the tape and sit through it again is part provocative yes, but it is also pretentiously perplexing.  The small amount of characters who we meet are completely barren to us and once it becomes clear that we are simply going to witness a spirit's depressing waste of an afterlife for ninety-minutes with no further, emotional investment into anything, the whole film falls drastically apart.  It is certainly different, but it is different in an alarming, disastrous way.

 

THE CARMILLA MOVIE

Dir - Spencer Maybee

Overall: GOOD

The full-length spin-off of the Canadian, LGBTQ-centered Carmilla web series simply titled The Carmilla Movie fuses cutesy, Gen-Z humor with mild, non-threatening undead world-building.  Both the series and film clearly adhere to a type of PG-rated Buffy the Vampire Slayer framework where a group of friends with certain quirks and expertise battle and/or investigate supernatural forces, fueled by endless quips and good-natured comradery amongst them.  The lighthearted tone is established right from the get go and the film never loses its comedic intent, even as the drama conventionally mounts up in the final act.  While some of these jokes are groaners, the entire thing has an innocent charm that is heightened by likeable performances and an inventive script that borders on convoluted yet harmlessly so.  There is minimal bloodshed and profanity, (almost to a non-existent quota), plus nothing happens that even a toddler would find frightening, but by far the strongest attribute is the respectful depiction of queer and lesbian characters, all but one of which are biologically female and most of whom are portrayed by actors identifying outside of the straight spectrum.  Even with one or two hot and steamy sex scenes, (sans nudity of course), it has none of the exploitative sleaze commonly found in genre movies as a whole and the core love story involving Natasha Negovanlis and Elise Bauman is delightfully sincere as well as easy to root for.

2016 Horror Part Five (Mike Flanagan Edition)

HUSH
Overall: MEH 

The horror film is prone and furthermore even relies on cliches to make them what they are.  Filmmakers continually utilize the same methods to make their films scary and nerve-wracking and it comes down to so many factors such as cinematography, music, pacing, and of course, the subject matter itself.  There are several ways to make your characters scared and if done successfully, to scare the audience as well.  Having strangers try and break into your house when you are all alone and potentially helpless is on or near the top of the list of things that would be universally terrifying to experience.  So a film like Hush from Mike Flanagan and his wife Kate Siegel, (who co-wrote as well as almost exclusively stars here), works as a once sentence premise undeniably.  Movies like this are backed into a corner each and every time though.  Basically, someone, (practically guaranteed to be a woman), is left at their most vulnerable, and if we are to have a ninety instead of a ten minute movie transpire, their pursuers have to appear inept at playing cat and mouse with them.  Which leaves the main protagonist the chance to overcome the odds and often times, their own personal inner-conflicts to not die at the end.  For better or worse, that is Hush ladies and gentlemen; a nifty concept that plays the rules just like they are always played.

BEFORE I WAKE
Overall: MEH

Easily Mike Flanagan's weakest film thus far was his second released in 2016, Before I Wake.  There is a number of blunders transpiring on screen here.  Similar to the works of M. Night Shyamalan, this has a prominent emphasis on its heartfelt dramatic aspects while forgoing logically coherent details.  Most things that happen in this movie happen because it is paramount that the audience be as emotionally invested as possible.  Yet when plot holes are so lackadaisically left everywhere, it is impossible to fall for the sap.  The story here has genuine elements and the performances are adequate, but simple things like the way the law works and reasonable character behavior are sidetracked to say the least.  Also, the undertaking to make everything fit into the horror camp comes off oddly contrived.  There is a CGI monster that looks terrible and behaves to a tee the way modern CGI monsters are supposed to, (even though in some scenes it is clearly someone in an actual body suite that looks infinitely better), there are boo scares a plenty of course, there are several specters that show up with zombie skin and empty eye sockets, and all of it seems wildly out of place.  Telling a very affectionate tale of coping with the loss of your children, but trying to have your "let's have a creepy horror movie thing jump out of a giant, black Christmas present while smiling" cake too makes this quite a faux pas.

OUIJA: ORIGIN OF EVIL
Overall: MEH

While watching Mike Flanagan's director-for-hire job Ouija: Origin of Evil, it could not be more apparent that the man's heart is barely in it.  He apparently wanted this to have as little to do with the 2014 lacklust Ouija as possible and really, none could blame him. A derivative yawn with dull throwback elements, (the opening titles, the spontaneous cue marks, the retro color filter, the fact that it is a period piece), it still manages to specifically fall into the contemporary horror stylings of The Conjuring more than anything from decades past.  Of course The Conjuring also has intentional call-back moments to older and superior horror films, which actually makes Origin of Evil even more uninspired.  All of the film's elements that are meant to be scary are not only entirely rehashed, but also easy to spot a mile and a half away.  This sadly is not limited to visual annoyances like CGI-morphed faces, wall crawling, and sudden movements/screechy noises acting as jump scares, but nearly every aspect of the plot itself.  Dead family members, psychics, creepy kids, dream sequences, foreshadowing a kindergartner could not miss, expository dialog delivered all at once, even a mental asylum for a few minutes of screen time are all boringly here.  Believe it or not, Flanagan actually ignores a handful of cliches he could have easily partaken of, but by that same token, you cannot forgive the handful of cliches he knowingly, (if even endearingly), embraced.

2015 Horror Part Four

DEMON
Dir - Marcin Wrona
Overall: GOOD

Recently deceased filmmaker Marcin Wrona, (who committed suicide during a festival that Demon was premiering at), constructed an almost whimsical horror jaunt based around the Jewish legend of a dybbuk.  The specifics of said legend are not important, (and they are explained a bit in the film itself so worry not), but generally, a dybuuk behaves accordingly to a disembodied spirit that would do horror-movie stuffs when given the chance.  Which it does here.  The odd and more compelling facet of Demon though is in the rather funny tone.  Various "Polish people sure do love their alcohol and their weddings don't they?" stereotypes are lovingly toyed with, but also kind of corrupted into something tragic at times.  There are elements of older eras making way for newer ones and these are shown both for comedic and melancholic effects at different times.  Spooky and unsettling imagery is predominantly missing, but Wrona twists several cliches around and plays with the mood of his film in a well balanced way.  It is of course a shame that the director took his own life and left such a small body of work behind him, but his final movie is something to get behind.

SOUTHBOUND
Dir - Radio Silence/Roxanne Benjamin/David Bruckner/Patrick Horvath
Overall: GOOD

A reunion of sorts from V/H/S's personnel, the writer/director/actor teams involved in Southbound do fine work here in another horror anthology, except now with a very good linking structure, (something every one of the V/H/S excursions dropped the ball on, big time).  Compared to the many such anthology movies that have been made in this genre, this one impressively stays steadily enjoyable.  Each concept for each story is thoroughly creepy and all of them are left somewhat open-ended, as not to paint everything in impossible to miss colors.  At times, it may be the human nature of the viewer's curiosity to perhaps get a few more answers resembling something substantial, but the uniform vagueness is still engaging.  A few blunders are sprinkled over the proceedings, case in point is a very easily avoidable car crash, but alas, it had to happen for obvious plot-developing reasons.  Yet other moments subvert what would otherwise be tired-out expectations.  With many such horror movies of a similar ilk consistently being made, one that is so, well, consistent is worth applauding.

EVOLUTION
Dir - Lucile Hadžihalilović
Overall: GOOD

Lucile Hadžihalilović's second full-length work Evolution is a confidently bizarre meditation on puberty, fertility, childhood, and the human body that kind of filters itself through a pair of horror lenses.  Hadžihalilović is little if at all interested in unmistakable closure or explanation; this is one of those films that post-research and musings are required.  At a spry eighty-one minutes, the isolated setting and continual pace is uplifted by several curious and startling moments.  Though nothing is made clear, (which the film may indulge too much in for some tastes), it remains gratifying to try and put the puzzle pieces together when watching everything unfold.  Why are there only gaunt looking women around the same age and young boys around the same age inhabiting this place?  Why are all the living quarters, clothes, furniture, and whatnot so barren?  What is going on with that "food"?  Those starfish mean something right?  Several theories come to mind and whether or not some or none of them are correct, it is only of grave importance depending on who you ask.  Leaving your viewer in the dark and hoping your images work on an emotive level above anything else is a tricky game to be sure, but Hadžihalilović pulls it off stylishly here.

2012 Horror Part Three

SILENT HILL: REVELATION
Dir - Michael J. Bassett
Overall: WOOF

Ever wonder what Batman V Superman would be like if it was a horror movie?  OK, well the Silent Hill: Revelation is not THAT terrible, but it is certainly ridiculous. British filmmaker Michael J. Bassett steps in for Christophe Gans who helmed the original, Bassett adapting the video game series strongest, Silent Hill 3 here.  Well, "attempting"to adapt one could more fairly say.  All the ingredients are visually here to satisfy the fan boy sure enough, but something else went horribly awry along the way.  That is to say that this could have the worst script in the history of cinema.  The plot points are nonsensical, the performances are stiff or campy, and as was the overwhelming issue with the first film, the dialog is consistently wretched.  The fact that everything is played remarkably straight either makes the film that much more awful or that much more awful and hilarious.  Basically what we have here is an unintentionally enjoyable dumpster fire of a horror movie.  The kind MST3K would have a field day with.  The results were enough to kill the franchise dead in its tracks and any potential promise to be had with the exceptionally atmospheric and creepy source material officially falls on deaf ears in such a botched cinematic form as this.

THE BAY

Dir - Barry Levinson

Overall: MEH

Environmental horror lends itself to the found footage sub-genre in lukewarm fashion with Barry Levinson's The Bay.  This is Levinson's first horror film in his long career and thankfully it does not come off as a bandwagon jumper even if that is probably what it is.  If we were talking about those trendy zombies, maybe this would seem a bit more pandering, but the story Levinson and screenwriter Michael Wallach have chosen to tell would have probably failed entirely if filmed conventionally.  As a faux-documentary with "footage" pulled from various sources, (and of course scary music in tow), The Bay hits home a little bit better than say what an Outbreak remake would have for comparison.  This is one of those horror movies where the premise is scary on its own yet the film itself is hardly terrifying.  Levinson lays the Eco-preaching on fairly thick which might turn off some and once we know what is going on, it never gets either frightening or interesting.  Instead, it rather plods along and the only take away is that viewers might second guess the next opportunity they have to eat any seafood.

BERBERIAN SOUND STUDIO
Dir - Peter Strickland
Overall: WOOF

An experiment was made here by British filmmaker Peter Strickland to make rather a horror version of Ingmar Bergman's Persona and the results could not have failed more.  No real point in comparing the two drastically different movies besides the fact that they both pose a film-itself-within-a-film, philosophical merging, but Berberian Sound Studio is an utter debacle.  The concept of showing the behind the scenes of the sound design on a 1970s giallo film set in Italy is interesting.  Keeping the images of said giallo 100% off screen and making the subject of it begin to morph into the real world is also interesting.  Yet the bewilderment of its presentation is quite crippling.  Both increasingly futile to follow, (which seemed premeditated), and hypnotically tedious, (which was probably only part-premeditated), it is a disaster stylistically.  Every scene in the film grows progressively random and monotonous, to the point where you are very much dreading the next one.  The end credits hit out of nowhere with no climax or resolution of any kind and sadly, this is not the kind of movie that such a ploy benefits from.  It is a pity really that Strickland willingly walked a tightrope to make his mindfuck of a film work on a deliberate level, only to have him plummet miles down the void, falling completely off that very tightrope.

2011 Horror Part Three

SLEEP TIGHT
Dir - Jaume Balagueró
Overall: GREAT

Jaume Balagueró's outstanding Sleep Tight is more of a straight up thriller than a horror film and a straight up thriller that gets everything right from beginning to end.  Balagueró’s direction and Alberto Marini’s script are both fantastic as we are deliberately misled from the very opening scene, only for things to remain completely unpredictable until the credits roll.  When your main objective is to build tension throughout the duration of your movie, this could not have been handled better.  Luis Tosar’s César is one of the most sinister villains you are likely to see; a malevolent, behind-the-scenes manipulator whose resourcefulness is as uncomfortably admiring as it is disturbing.  Plus, he is our main protagonist for the entire film, making this a challenging yet fascinating framework to utilize.  There is some perfectly toned, dark humor sprinkled throughout and numerous moments are as comically intense as they are memorable.  In addition, the ending is as pitch perfect as you were hoping not to hope it would be.  

THE INNKEEPERS
Dir - Ti West
Overall: MEH

Ti West's sophomore effort The House of the Devil gained the independent writer/director some positive critical attention, yet some of the problems that are present there are also in his follow-up The Innkeepers.  In this respect, West is a frustrating filmmaker.  His work is often present with well done, individual moments and the amount of tension he can create can be very rewarding.  Working mostly in the horror field, creepy, unsettling, and/or disturbing things find their way in some capacity into each of his offerings in this genre.  At the same time though, every one of his scripts suffer from irrational behavior from his characters and very apparent plot holes, all of which deflates what would otherwise work.  West's insistence on writing his scripts solo would appear to be the problem then.  With no one to bounce ideas off of and point out how some of them do not work, he stumbles to varying degrees.  There is some well-produced spookiness here, particularly a scene in a very eerie basement that is impossible not to get chilled by.  So it achieves its goal as a haunted house, (hotel), movie in that respect, but achieving its goal as a good movie in any other capacity is simply outside of its grasp.

YOU'RE NEXT
Dir - Adam Wingard
Overall: MEH

Another very problematic, contemporary horror outing that misses the mark with its botched tone and severely flawed script is Adam Wingard's You're Next.  Both Windgard's direction and screenwriter Simon Barrett's script are the culprits; neither melding into the competent whole that they are required to.  As a cooky, over-the-top, "Home Alone if it was a horror movie", tongue-in-cheek dark comedy, this could have utilized a far sillier emphasis to make its wacky plot work.  Instead, the comedy element is not the prominent one, Wingard choosing to play most of the film as a straight slasher outing.  This is even more precarious because for a long time now, slasher films are nearly impossible to come off as compelling or unique.  So, meshing one already tired sub-genre with another that would have benefited from more overt comedy produces a fumbling exercise for ninety-four minutes.  Wingard has a likeable enthusiasm for gore and seems content to stick with the horror genre, so hopefully he is capable of surprising us at some juncture further down the road.

2013 Horror Part Five

IN FEAR

Dir - Jeremy Lovering
Overall: MEH

One of the more frustrating horror debuts in recent times, Jeremy Lovering's In Fear gradually blows a compelling set-up and premise with a whole lot of logical problems.  It is a hefty irritation that so many films in this genre continually, time after time, make the exact same mistakes.  This film more than dips its toes in this continually present problem both with a slew of absurd decisions its main characters make and an enormous level of disbelieve that is expected of us to accept where the bad guy's behavior, motivation, and abilities are concerned.  Lovering wisely yet not wisely enough builds up our trust with a very well done, gradual state of dread which makes it possible to assume that the film exists in a more realistic world than it ultimately does.  By the end though, far too many moments do not add up and seem incredibly far-fetched as well as incompetently presented.  If you are looking for one of those horror movies you can get aggravated at going "how is that possible?" or "no one would do that, ever" then sadly this is not schlocky enough to be enjoyable in said context.  Instead, it has excellent potential as a minimally set, severely creepy slow-boil piece, but then degenerates due to the script's unfeasible specifics.

OCULUS
Dir - Mike Flanagan
Overall: GOOD

Mike Flanagan is quickly becoming one of the most prolific filmmakers as of late, particularly in the horror camp.  He made three such movies in 2016 alone and is perhaps unfortunately about to unleash yet another adaptation of The Haunting, this time as a miniseries for Netflix.  His first full-length Absentia was very solid and thankfully  Oculus likewise delivers.  Based off his own short film Oculus: Chapter 3 - The Man with the Plan, this one admittingly makes a few mistakes here or there.  Brenton Thwaites is somewhat miscast as he distractedly looks too much like a Disney princess to take seriously.  There is also a "here's some expository dialog all at once" scene that rides the line of being a bit too convenient and silly.  Unfortunately, the main characters keep the supernatural episodes they repeatedly witness from each other as well, yet another all-too-common, obnoxious horror trope.  Still, the film ultimately goes in a bold direction, taking some effective, nightmarish chances.  The results are appropriately nerve-wracking and spooky and as opposed to many other genre films of its kind, Flanagan actually lands the ending quite well.

BILOCATION
Dir - Mari Asato
Overall: MEH

There are times when holding the audiences hand during your movie's profuse twists and turns becomes something borderline comical and Mari Asato does this methodically in Bilocation.  Based off Haruka Hojo's novel of the same name, it starts rather eye-brow raising and silly, but then grows almost impressive in how "let's make sure the viewer is 100% caught up" it becomes.  At one point, a character whose name may as well have been Mr. Expository Dialog Man looks at the main character after posing a riddle and proclaims "Figured it out?  That riddle...is for you to solve."  In case it is not already elementary-style clear, said main character acts as the viewer themselves.  This stylistic route taken by Asato is by no means a work of pure ingenuity, (Japanese horror in particular is often prone to such spoon-feeding), but it is the defining factor from the experience.  As far as anything creepy or unsettling transpiring, the movie unfortunately comes up empty handed.  It does offer up some compelling conflicts and posed a satisfying if not laboriously persistent take on the doppelgänger mythos, but it is a bit too distracting in its dumbed-down, frightless approach.

2013 Horror Part Four

ENEMY
Dir - Denis Villeneuve
Overall: GREAT

By a knowingly broad, somewhat overreaching definition, Denis Villeneuve's adaptation of José Saramago novel The Double is a horror-ish movie.  Canadian Villeneuve has been hitting the big time as of late, working with A-listers and taking on the Blade Runner and Dune franchises now.  Enemy was a ways into his career and his second film in a row to feature Jake Gyllenhaal.  Though it was critically appreciated like pretty much all of Villeneuve's works have been, it has slipped a bit under the radar in the realm of "WTF" movies.  There is plenty to talk about here but that is really only if you are having a discussion with someone who has seen it already.  Javier Gullón's screenplay spells nothing out in plain English, but the mindfuck that the film is stays consistently interesting as opposed to pretentiously aggravating.  Clues are all over the place, (none of which seem haphazardly put there to make film-goers endlessly chaise their tales), with musical and visual cues signifying when things are more sinister than they appear.  Repeated viewings will reap rewards in this case and the slow, surreal, and challenging pace makes it quite psychologically pleasing to say the least.

DARK TOUCH
Dir - Marina de Van
Overall: MEH

Another "little girl with evil powers" movie, French filmmaker Marina de Van's Dark Touch is rather unremarkable.  It comes down to insipid specifics that apparently seem unavoidable when children are your protagonists.  Eight-year-old Niamh, (which is Irish for "Neve", judging by everyone in the movie pronouncing it that way), is traumatized and quiet with everyone, which makes her that creepy kid that all the other kids make disapproving glares at.  Because her abilities are what they are and manifest the way that they do, it is very, very difficult to find it interesting to see this yet again in a horror story.  By comparison, there have been hundreds if not thousands of slasher movies and even more ghost stories endlessly told yes, but the premise here just hits too many exact points to be absorbing.  Making matters worse, the final act is not sufficiently built-up and comes off as very random and unfocused.  Throw in a few other questionable choices, (how do two kids in the same town stay missing for days when Niamh goes missing and gets located almost immediately and isn't it illegal to film those bathtub scenes?), and you get a hefty pile of scripted errors.  Both Stephen King adaptations Firestarter and obviously Carrie are two other films that play the same sport and are worth one's time far more if we were to choose.

MAMA
Dir - Andrés Muschietti
Overall: MEH

Another largely disappointing horror film with Guillermo del Toro's name attached in executive producer form is Andrés Muschietti's debut Mama.  Sure there is one really good scene in it, (involving some playful spookiness), the cast is admirable, (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau from Game of Thrones and Jessica Chastain are always a good idea), and the initial premise is fine, but the ball is dropped nearly everywhere else.  Obnoxious sound design and startlingly poor visual effects usually do not thwart a film by themselves, but they come as close as possible here.  With such issues in place, it is not to Muschietti's benefit that the ending almost beats you in the head with said problems.  When most horror movies build up to the make-or-break finale then, this one was simply doomed.  Though the more overarching setback largely lies in the film's staleness as a safe, genre excursion as well as too many million-to-one details that only lazily-written fiction partakes of.  Imaginary friends, identical twins, mental asylums, digging up dead bones, major plot points coming via dreams, and so on and so on.  None of that stuff is horrible, but everything else going on had to be of a much higher caliber to give this a pass.

2016 Horror Part Four

THE NEON DEMON
Dir - Nicolas Winding Refn
Overall: MEH

As impressive and pretty as Natasha Braier's cinematography is in Nicolas Winding Refn's latest The Neon Demon, (all shots act like a stylish, flashy LA painting habitating someone's roofied dreamspace), everything else going on has a thick cloud of "huh?" hanging all over it.  Which is refreshing when a filmmaker leaves you guessing for most of the run time, barely if at all supplying you with any clear cut answers.  At just shy of two-hours though, it proves problematic to garnish much interest for such un-fleshed out characters.  Cartoonishly narcissistic or just downright nasty people repeatedly pop up and the randomness is not limited to the plot.  Per example, what the hell are Christina Hendricks and more especially Keanu Reeves barely even doing here?  Throughout the whole, Refn's point or lack-thereof seems to be absent from the party.  As a nasty, nihilistic horror film, this frustratingly reveals itself and ultimately botches its would-be creepy premise by its own forced pretentiousness.

I AM THE PRETTY THING THAT LIVES IN THE HOUSE
Dir - Oz Perkins
Overall: WOOF

A strong contender for the most boring movie ever made, I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives In the House is actor-turned-director Osgood Perkins second feature and it is a very different kind of bad from most lousy horror movies.  Understandably, it can be precarious when constructing your film as a slow-boil exercise and Perkins goes so far overboard into tedious terrain that it becomes exasperating.  Shot in only one location with virtually one actor, everything that transpires does so at a molasses-oozing pace, where all the stylistic touches prove a disservice.  The music constantly tells us when spooky things are happening and Ruth Wilson's on-going narration grows monotonous far quicker than it should, if it even should at all.  Her character's odd-ball, "aaaannyyy-who" eccentricities coupled with the claustrophobic setting and deliberate pace work very much against each other.  The ending seems like it will never come and also due to our fruitless narration, it was pre-determined almost immediately.  We know who is doomed and we know there are ghosts, but this information is dragged along tortuously for, (only), eighty-eight minutes, far past the point of being the least bit compelling.  Sadly, it is not an engaging story weighed down by an unsuitable approach; it is a barely there story overwhelmed by a refusal to appear anything close to inviting as a film experience.

THE SHALLOWS
Dir - Jaume Collet-Serra
Overall: MEH

Yet another lackluster effort from director aume Collet-Serra, The Shallows has a moderately idiot-proof concept of Blake Lively barely dressed and barely able to survive a shark attack for ninety-minutes.  Regrettably though, all of the attempts made to make her character intriguing come off as film-script-by-numbers laziness.  Of course screenwriters need to present their protagonists with a backstory and motivation for us to sympathize with them, but sometimes it is so obviously done that never once does it feel like you are not watching a movie.  The "hey look, everybody's overcoming their issues and being a stronger person a year later" coda further exemplifies this.  Which is perfectly OK as the film assuredly has its place among others like it and can scarcely be considered a bonafide disaster simply because it utilizes conventional such conventional narrative structures.  As fluently suspenseful, popcorn fare, it does not elevate the thriller genre in any real capacity, but it also does not attempt to in the first place and therefor can be taken or left, depending on the viewer of course.

2016 Horror Part Three

SPLIT
Dir - M. Night Shyamalan
Overall: MEH

Many times, (lets face it, almost every time), certain details in M. Night Shyamalan's films come off as silly and distracting, yet they usually succeed in a pure emotional context.  This takes center stage with Split.  The premise here challenges the movie-goer to once again give a shit about someone with multiple personality disorder, which so many authors take great delight with not only endlessly utilizing, but also making as unrealistic as possible, hence entertaining.  Shyamalan actually does this rather well, considering how overdone the basis of the plot is.  Always a good director if not a frustratingly uneven writer, Shyamalan is helped very much by James McAvoy's performance which rides a razor thin line of NOT becoming too ridiculous to lose investment in.  The fault here does not fall on anything insulting to the viewers intelligence, (Signs, The Village), or pure idiocy, (The Happening), but rather stretching the story a bit too long.  A half-hour give or take could have been shaved off to make it more effective and tight.  The final act arrives and then writhes along to a point where other elements begin to seem too far fetched and messy.  Yet as is the director's most genuine trait, it is moving and heartfelt enough to agree with.

A DARK SONG
Dir - Liam Gavin
Overall: GREAT

A Dark Song is the debut from Liam Gavin and it is arguably one of the most impressive horror films in recent memory.  Way more serious detail is devoted to the sinister, occult arts than usual in this film, but better still is the straight-forward dread that Gavin manages to convey.  Slowly and confidentiality, the movie becomes more and more terrifying by the frame, held together by the minimal setting and very grounded performances from its two leads in Catherine Walker and Steve Oram.  The score is likewise foolproof; one that barely qualifies as "music" most of the time which is exactly what this movie needs.  It is quite rare for a horror film to be so effectively creepy while utilizing the genre's would-be detriments wholly to its advantage.  At the same time, the movie balances serious themes by shining a light on emotionally crippling, all-consuming grief in human beings that can both horrifyingly and in this case, even exquisitely manifest itself.  Powerful and intensely spooky, this is a modern benchmark to be sure.

THE EYES OF MY MOTHER
Dir - Nicolas Pesce
Overall: GOOD

The debut of Nicolas Pesce is a film whose premise and execution are both equally wonderful in their unease.  Several things happen in The Eyes of My Mother that any non-psychotic viewer would have no interest whatsoever in seeing, but actually, most of these things remain literally unseen.  A black and white, beautifully shot, and brisk seventy-seven minute long vehicle into insanity, the movie is captivatingly uncomfortable, playing most of its cards intelligently.  If there are any lapses of logic to point out, they are minute, unimportant details which do not necessarily deserve a pass mind you since too many of such a thing can take one out of the experience.  Yet the sorrowful mood is so fascinating and terrifying that it is highly impressive that Pesce can construct such a technically simple story around an equally pathetic and unsympathetic lunatic of a protagonist without any questions arising that make the movie appear inept.  It certainly is not that, but certainly is something unique and challenging.