Dir - Sion Sono
"Mail me, mail me"
Another uniquely Japanese horror movie, this one baffled me a bit at first until I did some quick research and learned that it is simply a modern and ultra-violent twist on the Pied Piper legend. Right from the get go, Suicide Club, (or Suicide Circle as it was known in its native Japan), kicks off with a bloody bang, gripping your attention and pretty much assuring that you will very much want to find out what in the hell is going on for the rest of the proceedings. Equal parts disturbing, creepy, gory as hell, and head-scratchingly strange, (Japanese musician Rolly’s appearance sparks one of the HIIIIIIIIGHEST scenes I have ever seen), this film did not lose my attention for a second. Leave it to director Sion Sono to take a five-piece, dancing teen girl pop group and make them one of the most increasingly unsettling things in any movie.
Dir - David Lynch
WTF? - The Movie!
My favorite filmmaker, (along with a Mr. Stanley Kubrick of course), David Lynch obviously had to be represented on this list. Though all of his films defy genre classification, (hence the term “Lynchian” being born), all of them also contain horrific elements. As Eraserhead makes many a horror movie list out there, well, that is good enough for me then. I had to split hairs very much here with Lynch since in all honestly, I could have included almost all of the man’s films along with this one. If I did that though then he would have utterly dominated the top ten and Lost Highway probably would therefore be my “favorite horror movie”. Which is just silly. So, selective I chose to be and as far as Eraserhead goes, well, can one truly describe this film? I will try. A slow-moving, astonishingly bizarre, “plot-less”, ninety-minute nightmare that weaves in and out of so many horrifying, funny, and batshit crazy scenes that if anything else, it is bound to leave one hell of an impression on you. I would not call it Lynch’s best (Mulholland Drive) or believe it or not even his weirdest, (Inland Empire), but it is undoubtedly “Lynchain” and undoubtedly awesome.
Dir - Neil Marshall
"There's something down here"
The Descent set the bar pretty high as one of the best horror films of the 2000s. In the midst of brain-dead torture porn and gazillions of remakes and sequels, here was a fantastically executed, original British gem that deservedly scored big this side of the Atlantic. The film takes longer than most to get going, but I very much appreciated the extended set-up, not only to have so much time to get to know the characters, but to slowly ease you into a film that basically pulls a 180 on you and does not let up once the good stuff starts. I always dig the abrupt about-face in horror films and when “that moment” in the cave hits and the gloves fly deliciously off, I was on the edge of my seat digging every bloody moment of it. I must admit though that I am not too wild about the ending, (I never got the impression that the Asian chic was supposed to be the film’s “villain” somehow), but everything else works so well that it hardly damages the end product.
Dir - Nobuhiko Ôbayashi
Death by mattress
One has to love Japan. The way over-the-top, stylistic insanity that occupies most every frame in Nobuhiko Obayashi's Hausu is something no other country's singular aesthetics could have produced, let alone even dreamt of. I found it on a list of the “5 Most Baffling Horror Films From Around the World”, (thank you cracked.com), and it most certainly belongs there. Based on a story written by Obayashi’s daughter, Hausu is as much fun as you can possibly have watching a horror film and another nightmare-come-to-life movie where the “plot” is hardly as important as how much bananas shit you can throw on screen. Hausu is staggeringly ridiculous yett in a wildly entertaining way. What other film can you see a piano eat a girl, a decapitated floating head bite the ass of another girl, severed legs kung-fu fight a painting that bleeds so much it floods a room, and possessed lampshades, mattresses, and a grandfather clock? None other film, that is what.
66. THE CURSE OF FRANKENSTEIN (1957)
Dir - Terence Fisher
Here comes the Hammer
On to round two of the classic monster movies, Hammer Film Studios kicks off their prolific run with The Curse of Frankenstein, the first in a series of seven films starring that diabolical doctor. Peter Cushing, (who played the Baron in all of them except 1970s The Horror of Frankenstein), delivers arguably his finest performance here as a far more egomaniacal and villainous Doctor Frank than in any of the the Universal series or really in any future Frankenstein adaptations come to think of it. This was hardly the only thing that separated Hammer's version from the others. It was the first adaptation of the story in living, bloody color and the then graphic violence garnished most of the attention for the day. Hammer really establishes themselves as the masters of Gothic horror here more than anything else, all of which further helped inspire Roger Corman's later Edgar Alan Poe films amongst quite a few others.
65. CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON (1954)
Dir - Jack Arnold
Must be something in the water
The Creature From the Black Lagoon is the last great Universal monster movie and the best “man in a rubber suite” monster movie ever made. Portrayed gracefully in the water by Ricou Browning and hulkingly on land by Ben Chapman, the iconic Gill Man is a type of sympathetic monster more akin to Frankenstein’s creation or even Larry Talbot by moonlight. Julia Adams, (who spends most the entire film in a wet bathing suite), is a golden era robo-babe and certainly helps the film's, ahem, view-ability. Two more Creature sequels followed this one, but Universal had by this point retired the Wolf Man, Dracula, the Mummy, and the Frankenstein monster after copious amounts of sequels. Creature may be a graceful homage of sorts then, as it emerged in an era where UFOs and giant animal/thing monsters were the horror stuffs of the day. If the Gill Man would have debuted perhaps only a decade earlier, it is amusing to think how they would have fit him into such “monster mash” pairings as House of Dracula or House of Frankenstein. House of the Creature From the Black Lagoon mayhaps?
64. THE EXORCIST (1973)
Dir - William Friedkin
That is not where a crucifix goes
So low I know, but alas, let me explain. Like most people, I have a history with William Friedkin’s The Exorcist. It was my dad’s favorite horror movie and he waited until me and my brother were in Jr. High to let us watch it, (and this is coming from a man who used to take us to see every rated-R, gore-filled, profanity and nudity-ridden action movie that came out every Friday since the age of say six?). So obviously it was serious business and yes it scared the ever-loving shit out of me the first time I saw it. As well as the second and third time. These viewings were all quite spread out as I kept telling myself I would never watch it again. Then a funny thing happened just a year or two ago when I viewed it for the first time in ages. It was not only not scary anymore, but I in fact found myself rather bored. I have no explanation for this as the film is intentionally slow building which I almost always thoroughly enjoy. Also, one could not possibly say it does not “deliver” when good ole Pazuzu takes the kid gloves off and lets the unholy fury run amok. Though it may not keep me up at night anymore, I can still call it a favorite for all those classic scenes alone.
63. UZUMAKI (2000)
Dir - Higuchinsky
Snails on the walls go round and round...
This film is based on Junji Ito’s manga series of the same name about a Japanese village that is cursed by circles. Don't ask. There are some giddily fantastic visuals on display here, more and more as the whole thing rolls along. It is rather a kindred spirit to another utterly bonkers Japanese horror classic from over two decades prior, Hausu, (see number 67), mostly in the rather goofy tone and fast pace. Yet it is not as crazy, (hardly any movie is), and is in fact rooted in characters we actually can find ourselves caring about. Uzumaki’s final moments are just as bizarre as they are heartbreaking and they are likewise just as creepy as they are funny. It is all over the place in that respect yet ever so much fun. I have not read the manga comics source material yet, but one can only imagine even more death-by-circles moments are packed inside.
62. FASCINATION (1979)
Dir - Jean Rollin
Mmm...sexy blood wenches
Though Jean Rollin's film output is far from flawless (Le Frisson des Vampires is atrociously ridiculous), his style is admirable. Very slow moving, (he sure does like to use quality film time showing people walking around), low-key, Gothic eroticism is the man’s stock ‘n trade. Be it lesbian vampires, zombies, ghosts, or just sadistic blokes running amok, his films are highly stylized and usually fascinating to watch. Speaking of the “f word”, Fascination, which falls into the erotic lesbian vampire category, is certainly my bet for his masterpiece. Rollin’s films always delivered with the beautiful French maidens and Brigitte Lahaie is undoubtedly at the top of the heap. For those who wish to penetrate further, (huh huh), Miss Lahaie also had a prolific pornographic career around this time. Rollin’s filmmaking career spanned four decades and though I have only sampled some of his late 60s-early-80s classics, there is plenty more of his gems out there. Start with this one and if it does not intrigue you further, then I am afraid the man’s talents are lost on you.
61. [REC] (2007)
Dir - Jaume Balagueró/Paco Plaza
"We have to tape everything!"
Zombie everythings seem to be all over the place in the last ten years or so. I am sure the burn out will come eventually, (The Walking Shit did it for me), but with so many dead-people-eating-living-people movies being made, there are also bound to be some good ones in there. In 2007 from the unexpected depths of Spain came [REC], which not only falls into the zombie camp, but also the hand-held camera/found footage sub-genre that is likewise so popular nowadays. Since I am generally a fan of said sub-genre anyway, [REC] pretty much had me from the get go. The premise is absurdly simple. An “infection” starts in an apartment complex, a bunch of civilians get trapped against their will there, and voila, your horror movie is served. If it sounds familiar for those who have not done their research yet like to see movies that are not in Spanish, the film Quarantine is nearly a shot-for-shot remake. I actually saw Quarantine first and liked it quite a lot, but as is always the case, one usually has to go with the originals nearly ten times out of ten.
Dir - Terence Fisher
Here comes the Hammer
On to round two of the classic monster movies, Hammer Film Studios kicks off their prolific run with The Curse of Frankenstein, the first in a series of seven films starring that diabolical doctor. Peter Cushing, (who played the Baron in all of them except 1970s The Horror of Frankenstein), delivers arguably his finest performance here as a far more egomaniacal and villainous Doctor Frank than in any of the the Universal series or really in any future Frankenstein adaptations come to think of it. This was hardly the only thing that separated Hammer's version from the others. It was the first adaptation of the story in living, bloody color and the then graphic violence garnished most of the attention for the day. Hammer really establishes themselves as the masters of Gothic horror here more than anything else, all of which further helped inspire Roger Corman's later Edgar Alan Poe films amongst quite a few others.
Dir - Jack Arnold
Must be something in the water
The Creature From the Black Lagoon is the last great Universal monster movie and the best “man in a rubber suite” monster movie ever made. Portrayed gracefully in the water by Ricou Browning and hulkingly on land by Ben Chapman, the iconic Gill Man is a type of sympathetic monster more akin to Frankenstein’s creation or even Larry Talbot by moonlight. Julia Adams, (who spends most the entire film in a wet bathing suite), is a golden era robo-babe and certainly helps the film's, ahem, view-ability. Two more Creature sequels followed this one, but Universal had by this point retired the Wolf Man, Dracula, the Mummy, and the Frankenstein monster after copious amounts of sequels. Creature may be a graceful homage of sorts then, as it emerged in an era where UFOs and giant animal/thing monsters were the horror stuffs of the day. If the Gill Man would have debuted perhaps only a decade earlier, it is amusing to think how they would have fit him into such “monster mash” pairings as House of Dracula or House of Frankenstein. House of the Creature From the Black Lagoon mayhaps?
Dir - William Friedkin
That is not where a crucifix goes
So low I know, but alas, let me explain. Like most people, I have a history with William Friedkin’s The Exorcist. It was my dad’s favorite horror movie and he waited until me and my brother were in Jr. High to let us watch it, (and this is coming from a man who used to take us to see every rated-R, gore-filled, profanity and nudity-ridden action movie that came out every Friday since the age of say six?). So obviously it was serious business and yes it scared the ever-loving shit out of me the first time I saw it. As well as the second and third time. These viewings were all quite spread out as I kept telling myself I would never watch it again. Then a funny thing happened just a year or two ago when I viewed it for the first time in ages. It was not only not scary anymore, but I in fact found myself rather bored. I have no explanation for this as the film is intentionally slow building which I almost always thoroughly enjoy. Also, one could not possibly say it does not “deliver” when good ole Pazuzu takes the kid gloves off and lets the unholy fury run amok. Though it may not keep me up at night anymore, I can still call it a favorite for all those classic scenes alone.
Dir - Higuchinsky
Snails on the walls go round and round...
This film is based on Junji Ito’s manga series of the same name about a Japanese village that is cursed by circles. Don't ask. There are some giddily fantastic visuals on display here, more and more as the whole thing rolls along. It is rather a kindred spirit to another utterly bonkers Japanese horror classic from over two decades prior, Hausu, (see number 67), mostly in the rather goofy tone and fast pace. Yet it is not as crazy, (hardly any movie is), and is in fact rooted in characters we actually can find ourselves caring about. Uzumaki’s final moments are just as bizarre as they are heartbreaking and they are likewise just as creepy as they are funny. It is all over the place in that respect yet ever so much fun. I have not read the manga comics source material yet, but one can only imagine even more death-by-circles moments are packed inside.
Dir - Jean Rollin
Mmm...sexy blood wenches
Though Jean Rollin's film output is far from flawless (Le Frisson des Vampires is atrociously ridiculous), his style is admirable. Very slow moving, (he sure does like to use quality film time showing people walking around), low-key, Gothic eroticism is the man’s stock ‘n trade. Be it lesbian vampires, zombies, ghosts, or just sadistic blokes running amok, his films are highly stylized and usually fascinating to watch. Speaking of the “f word”, Fascination, which falls into the erotic lesbian vampire category, is certainly my bet for his masterpiece. Rollin’s films always delivered with the beautiful French maidens and Brigitte Lahaie is undoubtedly at the top of the heap. For those who wish to penetrate further, (huh huh), Miss Lahaie also had a prolific pornographic career around this time. Rollin’s filmmaking career spanned four decades and though I have only sampled some of his late 60s-early-80s classics, there is plenty more of his gems out there. Start with this one and if it does not intrigue you further, then I am afraid the man’s talents are lost on you.
Dir - Jaume Balagueró/Paco Plaza
"We have to tape everything!"
Zombie everythings seem to be all over the place in the last ten years or so. I am sure the burn out will come eventually, (The Walking Shit did it for me), but with so many dead-people-eating-living-people movies being made, there are also bound to be some good ones in there. In 2007 from the unexpected depths of Spain came [REC], which not only falls into the zombie camp, but also the hand-held camera/found footage sub-genre that is likewise so popular nowadays. Since I am generally a fan of said sub-genre anyway, [REC] pretty much had me from the get go. The premise is absurdly simple. An “infection” starts in an apartment complex, a bunch of civilians get trapped against their will there, and voila, your horror movie is served. If it sounds familiar for those who have not done their research yet like to see movies that are not in Spanish, the film Quarantine is nearly a shot-for-shot remake. I actually saw Quarantine first and liked it quite a lot, but as is always the case, one usually has to go with the originals nearly ten times out of ten.
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