(1981)
Dir - Francis Delia
Overall: MEH
In the early 80s, some pornographic films were still being shown in theaters, had production values, had scripts, and occasionally were considered "real" movies at least compared to what the industry's output would become in the VHS days that were lurking shortly around the corner. Not to make this an adult film history lesson, but Nightdreams along with the follow year's Café Flesh, (both produced by Stephen Sayadian aka Rinse Dream), were rather pioneering pornos that incorporated avant-garde elements with sci-fi and horror. Discussing the former here, its got enough bizzaro-world qualities to make Forbidden Zone blush, generally unnerving sound design, and atmospheric cinematography. It also has laughably awful acting and dialog plus the sex scenes are exceptionally boring. They are also way too weird to actually be stimulating, so that does not help much. The predicament with watching more ambitiously artistic pornography is in nailing down what type or types of emotions you are supposed to be feeling anyway, which is a confusing exercise. When it really goes off the rails and indulges in its wackadoo imagination, Nightdreams is as amusing as any piece of surreal work is. When its not, it is just kind of awkwardly unerotic and unintentionally goofy. With its powers combined though, it is at least memorable.
(1983)
Dir - Michael Mann
Overall: MEH
The third full-length from Michael Mann was his only such to be a deliberate horror film, the adaptation of the F. Paul Wilson novel The Keep. A troubled production that went over budget with an additional nine weeks of re-shoots and had its visual effects supervisor die shortly into post-production, Mann finished a two-hundred and ten minute cut that was drastically shortened down to a mere ninety. Because of all of this, the film's plot has very little coherency. Even without knowing the problematic back story, it is impossible not to notice that enormous sections had to have been left out due to how impossibly befuddled it is. With so many detrimental elements out of his control, Mann makes the most of what he has. In lesser hands, the material could have been far more ham-fisted, but the director is at least skilled enough to keep the tone under control and the movie comes off less ridiculous than it deserves. Committed and often overdone performances from familiar faces like Scott Glenn, Gabriel Byrne, Jürgen Prochnow, and Ian McKellen notwithstanding. The choppy script and shoddy special effects do take quite a tole though and ultimately the respectable elements can hardly overcome them.
(1989)
Dir - Dan Hoskins
Overall: MEH
With a title like Chopper Chicks in Zombietown, there really is very little room for speculation. There are chicks on choppers, there is a town, and there are zombies. Truth in advertising. Only being distributed by Troma Entertainment, it is filmed competently enough, but it is just as over the top and trying-way-too-hard-to-be-schlocky as any other film made by the company. Spending practically zero time establishing any kind of plot, the movie cruises through groan-worthy dialog, women acting like testosterone-ridden pigs, bizarre set pieces, and minimal character development if any at all. For the most part, the effects and actual zombies are pretty pathetic, but that is neither surprising nor detrimental really. It is best to just sit back and try to laugh at how little the movie cares about doing anything except making you, well, laugh at how moronic it is. Of course it would not be a Troma movie without an embarrassing moment or twelve and one such scene early on where the head of the biker gang plays an instrumental song on a jukebox and starts singing over it ranks incredibly high on the random as hell, cringe-worthy scale. Partake of at your own risk, but you may find it intellectually numbing enough to pass an evening with.
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