1970s Foreign Horror Part Six

JONATHAN
(1970)
Dir - Hans W. Geißendörfer
Overall: MEH

There is a thin line between being too smart for your audience and just being pretentious because you can.  Hans W. Geißendörfer's debut film Jonathan, (which was also the first that famed cinematographer Robby Müller worked on), rides this line rather consistently.  While certainly flawed, it is anything but uninteresting.  Geißendörfer and Müller shoot nearly every scene in very long, slow, one-take panning shots and the behavior of every character is so bizarre that not much of anything the frame lingers on will compute much.  A bunch of villagers surround and stare comatose-like at a couple having sex in a barn, a man is kicked nearly to death for no decipherable reason, a priest and a shoe-less alter boy pray in a dilapidated church and then the boy sets fire to a large haystack, a flock of children appear out of nowhere and dance around whilst singing, a guy wakes up to a woman boning him and they just kind of lay there silent afterwards, and vampire women in red and white robes hover around a Count who is clearly a stand-in for Hitler.  The lumbering pace gets a bit much and the metaphoric elements of "vampires = the Third Reich" do not really go anywhere beyond obvious surface level, but there are more than enough curious and strange ingredients that complemen this as an art film with no agenda to tell a coherent story.

NIGHT OF FEAR
(1972)
Dir - Terry Bourke
Overall: MEH

Yawn.  The major/only plus side to Night of Fear, (which was originally commissioned as a potential pilot by the Australian Broadcasting Company for a television show called Fright), is that it is only fifty-minutes long.  Not that it needs to be any longer than that to quickly put you to sleep.  Written and produced by Rod Hay and directed by Terry Bourke, the concept is somewhat interesting as a down under version of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre with no character names and no dialog.  Yet all that it ends up being is nearly an hour of a grunting hermit slowly stalking women and then ripping at their clothes to unleash rats on them.  Seriously, that is it and then the credits role.  There is a clear attempt here to be experimental with the slasher format and to up the disturbing elements so it gets an "OK" for effort at least.  There are a couple of somewhat nightmare scenes that are visually rather macabre enough as well.  It is horrendously boring though to sit through, beginning and ending by solely showcasing the most boring part about slasher movies in general which is just the stupid cat and mouse chase.  It is nearly impossible to see it as anything except very forgettable.

RITUALS
(1977)
Dir - Peter Carter
Overall: MEH

Canada's answer to John Boorman's Deliverance was Rituals, a film that is unmistakably derivative as well as unfortunately wrought with illogical slasher troupes and obnoxious characters.  In some respects, Ian Sutherland's script works to make the group of doctors that are hunted and marooned in the Ontario wilderness rather fully formed.  There is a fair amount of screen time given to them arguing with each other in both playful and overly dramatic ways and their comradery early on does appear to be genuine.  As the tension wracks up though, the endless yelling and bitching between them starts to get grating on the senses and though it is clearly done to make the audience feel uncomfortable along with the people on the screen, this along with the movie's other shortcomings rear their ugly head.  It is too generous of a leap for us to take with yet another scenario of a deranged mountain man playing cat and mouse with people.  When does this guy sleep?  How is he such a criminal mastermind as to be seven steps ahead of them at all times?  Are we to believe what we are told that he is so vengeful and diabolical as to justify him not murdering them easily when he has constant chances?  While Peter Carter's direction is at times very atmospheric and the barren landscape is perfectly matched with the hopeless plight of the parties involved, it still lacks the necessary plausibility to truly connect.  Also the music is for the most part awful and sappy and as is unfortunately common, not enough scenes play out to disturbing silence as they should.

1970s Foreign Horror Part Five

CANNIBAL GIRLS
(1973)
Dir - Ivan Reitman
Overall: MEH

Ivan Reitman's second feature Cannibal Girls sounds quite promising on paper.  SCTV members Eugene Levy and Andrea Martin are on board and both Reitman and producer/co-writer Daniel Goldberg have enough noteworthy films on their resume to assume that this early one would be worth one's time.  Sadly though, this is not the case.  Cannibal Girls rides that difficult line of parody, but many things get in the way of making the tone shifts work.  It plays out more like a Herschell Gordon Lewis movie that is trying to be funny yet is not.  Much of the dialog appears to be improvised and the camera lingers on nearly every scene much longer than it should, dragging the pace down considerably.  Worse yet, hardly anything anyone says is all that funny and the plot is terribly structured.  The premise is top notch, but it actually would have worked far better as a straight horror film where the long, silent shots and the concept of a bizarre, friendly Canadian town being up to no good would make for a thoroughly creepy, would-be end result.  Instead, these aspects just jive poorly with the humor that falls flat and the editing that makes the film confusing..  It is a noble effort, but all of the talent involved would go on to much better works later on.

THE CARS THAT ATE PARIS
(1974)
Dir - Pete Weir
Overall: MEH

The first feature film to be written and directed by Pete Weir, (not counting the fifty-two minute Homesdale from 1971), was The Cars That Ate Paris; a curiously titled, positively odd work to be sure.  Set in the fictional, rural town of Paris somewhere in Australia, (adding to the confusion since one would assume Paris, France), the movie plays out like a subtle black comedy with noticeably visual similarities with the Mad Max franchise, (and even also stars Bruce Spence who has made a career out of being a goofy looking character actor).  Yet instead of being post-apocalyptic, it is another kind of small town horror where an unwholesome doings are transpiring and this little hotbed of sinister activity seems to exist by rules that are all its own.  It does not quite work as well as it should since the motivations of various characters remains too obscure.  Though this was probably done on purpose, it is rather difficult to grasp who is in league with who and the only unmistakable theme is a vague, "elders vs the youth" one that does not really get explored beyond surface level.  Main protagonist Arthur Waldo, (Terry Camilleri), is just kind of lost in all the goings on, being sheepishly uncomfortable throughout.  While at least his final fate is humorous, that of the rest of Paris seems rather randomly open-ended.

NOSFERATU THE VAMPYRE
(1979)
Dir - Werner Herzog
Overall: GREAT

Out of the innumerable Dracula films out there and the several dozen that adapt Bram Stoker's original novel, few are as utterly superb as Werner Herzog's Nosferatu the Vampyre, (Nosferatu: Phantom der Nacht).  To be specific, this is a deliberate homage to the F.W. Murnau silent film Nosferatu, one which Herzog has gone on record as saying is the single greatest German film ever made.  He is probably not wrong.  For his take on it, Herzog once again works with Klaus Kinski and the electronic band Popol Vuh and the results are nearly as spellbinding as their initial collaboration Aguirre, the Wrath of God.  Utilizing footage shot in Mexico, Czechoslovakia, and the Netherlands and filming two versions simultaneously, (one with the actors speaking in German, the other in English), Herzog spends comparatively little of his time on dialog here, instead letting his camera capture the beautiful, the grotesque, and the bizarre all in equal, lush measures.  This creates an atmosphere that is extraordinarily haunting from beginning to end.  Kinski's Count Dracula is more pathetic than usually depicted and all of the barren, soft gloomy shots of rat-laden city streets and the Carpathian mountains further emphasize his loneliness, one that literally spreads like the plague by the film's end.  It may be the most visually striking Dracula film ever made and another paramount example of what Herzog and Kinski with their powers combined were wonderfully able to accomplish.

1970s Foreign Horror Part Four

THE DEVIL'S NIGHTMARE
(1971)
Dir - Jean Brismée
Overall: GOOD

Slow in parts and if you are watching the English dubbed version, be prepared of course to unintentionally chuckle at how awful the dialog comes off, but the Belgium/Italian co-production The Devil's Nightmare, (The Devil's Longest Night, The Terrifying Night of the Demon, and The Devil Walks at Midnight), gets by just enough on its spooky atmosphere and fun, be it simple premise.  All of the avenues that the plot takes are pretty standard and foreseeable as the characters are more caricatures than anything, each meeting their doom while somewhat representing one of the seven deadly sins, which is highly convenient for the evil forces that are after them.  Yet director Jean Brismée does a mostly fine job of staging everything in a memorable way, whether it is uncomfortable closeups of gluttony, brutal murders by way of medieval torture devices, random lesbians for some reason, and subtle, creepy make-up design.  Most of the performances come off either too stiff or silly, but Daniel Emilfork and Erika Blanc still manage to be appropriately ghoulish in their respected, sinister roles.  The musical score for once is actually rather strong as well, probably because it is from the hilariously named Alessandro Alessandroni, the man behind the iconic, "Man with No Name" trilogy soundtrack.

THE RAT SAVIOR
(1976)
Dir - Krsto Papić
Overall: GOOD

One of the few, (only?), Croatian horror films out there, Izbavitelj, (The Rat Savior), was based off of Russian author Alexander Grin’s 1920’s novel Pacolovac, which translates to "The Ratcatcher".  Made on a very modest budget and shot in the country's capital of Zareb, it plays out as a creepy fairytale with excellent similarities to Invasion of the Body Snatchers, Society, or any other "what is this large group of people up to?" type fare.  The movie is not particularly shocking or even that violent while being less of a mystery in general and more of a moody, politically-conscious, extreme fantasy where the social commentary can likewise remind one of George Orwell's 1984 amongst other things.  The Rat Savior is also pretty void of humor and not at any point does it treat itself in any kind of tongue in cheek way.  This is a plus and a testament to Krsto Papić's wise direction which builds up a level of dread while still successfully glossing over many details, briskly moving the film along, (it is less than a hour and a half), letting the minimalist make-up effects never come off as silly, and not letting any hammy performances get in the way.

THIRST
(1979)
Dir - Rod Hardy
Overall: MEH

One of the stranger vampire films to come out of the 1970s, (saying something), Rod Hardy's full-length debut Thirst is an interesting, partially successful combination of Soylent Green and any film where the main protagonist cannot seem to wake up from their nightmare nor be able to tell whether they are tripping balls or not.  The set-up is certainly interesting and carries the movie through most of its deficiencies.  These would be the score by Brian May, (no not THAT Brian May), which rarely shuts up long enough to not tell us when something evil is going on.  Also, the kind of underwritten plot leaves out too many details for its own good.  Ambiguity can very often times be a plus in horror films, but Thirst does not necessarily give off the aura of mystery that it needs in order to complement the lack of answers that we are given.  It just seems kind of "buh?" instead.  The ending in particular is structured like it is supposed to be a twist, but there is a lingering feeling that several things may not have been conveyed like they were supposed to, making the wrap-up unsatisfying.  Some of the performances are rather eerie and Australian soap opera star Chantal Contouri is excellent as the tormented lead with a diabolical lineage, but it is still a shame that the movie comes so close to pulling off its wacky premise only to fall just shy of such an accomplishment.

1970s Foreign Horror Part Three

DIABEL
(1972)
Dir - Andrzej Żuławski
Overall: MEH

This politically conscious, nasty art film Diabel, (The Devil), from Andrzej Żuławski was his second overall and helped set the template for excited characterizations from his cast as well as overt violence and sexual deviance.  With nigh an exception, every character seems to uncontrollably contort their body in extravagant spasms and with the whole thing beginning with the, (probably), title character freeing the main protagonist from a completely overrun insane asylum during the 18th century, Prussian invasion of Poland, it could be logically assumed that the entire movie is an intentionally bewildering allegory of some sort.  If not, then it is just a bunch of miserable, awful set pieces meant only to make you loathe humanity and be uncomfortable, (Lars von Trier probably saw this and got such an idea for his entire career).  There are certainly movies more strange and many others more unwholesome, but the lengthy running time and deliberate incoherence does indeed make it all a steady bummer to sit through after awhile.  Żuławski shoots much of it in frantic, hand-held, long takes that while impressive, likewise serve their purpose to make the viewer rather distressed in their seat.  The bleak cinematography does a similar trick that if anything else, also makes the harsh tone thoroughly consistent.

BLACK CHRISTMAS
(1974)
Dir - Bob Clark
Overall: MEH

POV shots, a cat and mouse sensibility, and the picking off of young, attractive college girls are some of the more future-frequented elements in Bob Clark's seminal Black Christmas that would occasionally be done better but usually far, far, far worse in the coming decades.  Clark was already an established horror maestro with Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things and Deathdream directly proceeding this and the future Porky's and A Christmas Story director infused a liberal amount of humor to A. Roy Moore's script, which works in some instances while not in others.  Margot Kidder and Marian Waldman make excellent drunks, but the "fellatio" gag happens two times too many and goes on for too long in both instances.  Olivia Hussey is hit or miss as the final girl as some of her dialog and delivery steps too far into high school play territory, but the ambiguous ending and Carl Zitter's strange, ambient piano banging "music" are excellent touches.  By being a slasher film though, Black Christmas does too many things insultingly wrong.  If the screaming calls are coming from inside of the house, (and at least once happening when a loud murder is actually taking place), how in the fuck would the person on the other line not notice it is inside the house?  Nobody is going to check the attic at the end even when you can see a fucking dead body through the window from outside?  Also Hussey's character does the textbook, excruciatingly aggravating thing of not getting the fuck out of harm's way when every shred of conceivable logic would make anybody do so.  Oh, and one of the all time worst horror cliches of cops not taking anybody seriously rears its ugly head as well, though at least that latter detail is poked fun at within the film.  Still, putting it there in the first place does everything to take you out of the experience, as so many of these slasher faux pas commonly do.  Also the movie is honestly pretty boring since it just revolves around waiting for the phone to ring to hear some incomprehensible gibberish and screaming.

LONG WEEKEND
(1978)
Dir - Colin Eggleston
Overall: GREAT

One may find Colin Eggleston's first non-softcore porno movie Long Weekend to be a bit of blatantly on-the-nose silliness.  You may also be caught up in what does NOT happen to the point of being genuinely captivated.  From the get go, the two person cast are as unlikable as you get, deliberately so.  Not only are they in a clearly dysfunctional relationship with each other, both switching wildly from being aggressively whimsical to almost psychotically angry and distant with each other, but their disregard for all things nature is given frequent examples.  They haphazardly chop down trees for no reason, run over animals, shoot off ammunition into the wilderness, spray pesticide to the point of murdering any organic lifeform within miles, smash eagle eggs, and leave garbage and food lying around.  Yet what begins to transpire all around them is quite gradual to the point where something fantastical is clearly at play, but it is given no specifics at any point.  Eggleston and first time non-TV screenwriter Everett De Roche take a lot of opportunities to insinuate that this will be another out of countless "people get murdered by a bunch of creepy locals while on vacation" movies so when it does not go that route, an applause at the very least is in order.  Even as a nature horror film, it also forgoes just having a giant animal or something ala Jaws spring up and reek havoc so in effect, it plays a much more creepy, bewildering game.  With a more fractured tone or less visceral performances from its two leads, Long Weekend could easily be a failure but instead it is one of the more refreshing tweaks to the horror film out there.

1970s Paul Naschy Part Five

EL JORABADO DE LA MORGUE
(1972)
Dir - Javier Aguirre
Overall: MEH

While it is true that Paul Naschy was rarely better as an actor than he was as the deformed, simpleton title character Gotho in El Jorabado de la Morgue, (The Hunchback of the Morgue, The Rue Morgue Massacres), Naschy's own script for the film in all honesty is exasperatingly stupid.  Particularly, the movies that Naschy himself wrote, (this one included), always hilariously have women falling head over heels in love with him, but the excuse he makes here is more bananas than usual.  Speaking of bananas, the mad Dr. Orla is comically narcissistic and goes from a normal scientist to one that makes excited speeches about how wonderful his creation is with zero concern for how many people he consistently convinces Nashy's hunchback to murder.  Those who help him with all of this nonsense come off even more dumb.  If you are already planning on turning the guy in to the authorities and are practically positive that he has either kidnapped or murdered your fiance, why would you go to his lair unarmed and confront him before calling the police?  It is certainly amusing to watch all of this play out and the film is plenty gory.  It even manages to throw in a torture chamber, a totally unexplained zombie for one scene, and an oozy goo monster.  Very peculiarly, the editing is virtually void of any establishing shots and as it goes along, the movie seems to be in a frantic hurry to be over with.  At least you cannot complain that the pacing drags then.

EL MARSHALL DEL INFERNO
(1974)
Dir - León Klimovsky
Overall: MEH

Based rather vaguely off the Baron Gilles de Rais of France, (who fought alongside Joan of Arc and then far less respectably died as a confessed child murderer, oops), El Marshall del Inferno is far more a historical action film than horror and not much better off because of it.  Translated to The Marshall from Hell and released internationally as The Devil's Possessed as well as Satan Possessed in Argentina, Naschy teams up once again with his frequent collaborator León Klimovsky, but the result does not generate much interest for anyone outside of the steadfast Naschy fan.  There are a few scenes of diabolical rituals and torture, but Naschy's character from the get-go is rather lazily duped by his conniving wife and her alchemist who far too easily trick him into spending years murdering innocent villagers, former allies, and then sacrificing their daughters to the point of a revolt that does him in.  Because Naschy's Barron is too pathetic and underwritten, he is never given any proper depth as to why he goes so insane.  Even after he finds out that he is being played for a sucker, the movie still goes on for twenty more minutes with him acting just as horribly to everyone.  Lots of screen time is dedicated to Guillermo Bredeston being a dashing hero rallying the townsfolk and it is just as lackluster to sit through as everything else.

EXORCISMO
(1975)
Dir - Juan Bosch
Overall: GOOD

Though it remains unconfirmed whether or not Paul Naschy did indeed pen the script for Exorcismo before The Exorcist was released as the actor always proclaimed, in either respect it is impossible not to compare it to the most famous horror movie ever made and in effect see it as the Spanish "answer" to it.  If it was simply a coincidence, (or if in fact Naschy had caught wind of William Peter Blatty's novel for inspiration himself), it is a pretty remarkable one.  There are plenty of details that are quite different though, such as but not limited to the girl possessed being much older than twelve-year old Linda Blair, the serial killer subplot, scenes of hippies conducting nude Satanic masses, and Naschy's Father Dunning is a much stronger-willed, straight good priest to Jason Miller's conflicted Father Damien Karras.  In any event, this is one of Naschy's better scripts by a mile and it successfully transcends being an exploitative knock-off.  The concept of an upper-class young woman succumbing to possession after her father suffered mental illness and then falling into drugged-out occultists, (with a perverted house servant, overbearing brother, and an over-dotting mother not particularly of any help), is plenty layered.  Director Juan Bosch never once lets the film stride anywhere near camp, keeping the music and tone perfectly in unsettling check.  The only complaint really is the somewhat ho-hum finale, but it is solid enough up until then to still warrant it as one of Nashy's all around better movies.

1970s Paul Naschy Part Four

SEVEN MURDERS FOR SCOTLAND YARD
(1971)
Dir - José Luis Madrid
Overall: MEH

Paul Naschy's first giallo Seven Murders for Scotland Yard, (Jack el destripador de Londres, Jack the Ripper of London), is a pretty dull one.  A number of screenwriters were credited including Nashcy and director José Luis Madrid, (who the actor would go on to make The Crimes of Petiot with next).  While the script appropriately keeps you guessing as long as possible and only shows the killers feet or hands as is typical, it is still a pretty "eh, whatever" reveal.  Most of the problem lies with Madrid's direction which is severely lacking in the proper gusto that Italian giallos were usually ripe with.  None of the murder scenes are remotely exciting and when it becomes crystal clear that every woman we see on camera is eventually going to get a knife stuck in their stomach, (usually within seconds of introducing them), it does not do much to keep the viewer invested.  Naschy for his part is rather wasted, spending the whole movie limping around and looking like either a sad or angry puppy, depending.  Worse yet, there is only one piece of music that is played in nearly every single scene and it grows increasingly obnoxious to hear the same funky bass line and hi-hat groove over and over again, despite what one may think.

LA MALDICION DE LA BESTIA
(1975)
Dir - Miguel Iglesias Bonns
Overall: GOOD

The eighth Waldemar Daninsky go-round for Paul Naschy was in La Maldicion de la Bestia, (The Curse of the Beast, Night of the Howling Beast, The Werewolf and the Yeti, Hall of the Mountain King), the last to be released in the 1970s.  The gimmick here was to switch the location to Tibet and have a wolfman fight a yeti, (though he was also bitten by one in the debacle Fury of the Woflman earlier in the decade).  This as well as a few other fresh ingredients such as a Daninsky getting transformed by two vampire women biting him, (?!?), Tibetan pirates, a sadistic witch, and a cure for lycanthropy involving a red flower and blood or something that actually works all heighten it a bit over others in the series which essentially recycled the same plot ad nauseam.  The nudity and gore are as on point as any other of Nashy's films and one particularly gruesome scene sees a woman getting her back flayed alive.  Most surprising of all though is how comparatively tight Nashy's own screenplay is.  It is still quite rudimentary, but despite the yeti being rather shoehorned in there and the almost fairytale-worthy, convenient ending, it follows a pretty coherent thread and the slew of nasty villains and wacky details typical of a Naschy film all help it transcend most of the actor's other fun yet still flawed works.

INQUISITION
(1976)
Dir - Paul Naschy
Overall: GOOD

For his directorial debut, Paul Naschy chose the much frequented witch trials of Europe as subject matter.  Though it takes place in a historically accurate setting, (16th century France), Inquisition is not based off of any specific events.  It may as well be as it hits the same beats as many, many other films of its kind that also dramatize that long, dark period where any and everyone could be tried and executed as having a pact with the Dark One and hundreds upon hundreds of people where indeed put to death over such nonsense.  As always, the "divine" acts of the church and Nashy's witchfinder are depicted brutally and despicably.  In this respect, one cannot say that the film does not deliver when it comes to horrific scenes of torture.  Whereas it is usually common for no satanic tomfoolery to be happening at all in these movies and they just act as horror via extreme religious paranoia, Inquisition actually has some fantastic scenes of sabbaths full of naked people, blood drinking, and Naschy himself as Satan equipped with a goat mask, red eyes, and horns while sitting at a huge banquet table, foreseeing his evil orgy.  What really elevates the movie though is Naschy's very strong, low-key performance and by incorporating actual supernatural elements and playing them seriously, it shows such real life events in a more fantastical way, making it far more interesting than just another incredibly depressing, witch-murdering movie.

1970s Paul Naschy Part Three

LOS MONSTRUOS DEL TERROR
(1970)
Dir - Hugo Fregonese/Tulio Demicheli
Overall: MEH

What could fairly be described as Paul Naschy's all time silliest movie, Los Monstruos del Terror, (Dracula vs. Frankenstein, Reincarnator, Assignment Terror), must have been a euphoric experience for the actor who got to write and star in a Spanish version of all of his favorite Universal monster mash-ups.  While Naschy plays his trusty werewolf Waldemar Daninsky for the third, (though second to be released), time, he is joined by one of the lamest Draculas, a mummy, and a Frankenstein monster and also gets to personally duke it out with the latter of the two.  Naschy's part is comparatively small as is the budget which was originally to include more sci-fi elements as well as a golem.  This leaves most of the running time to none other than Michael Rennie, (Klaatu from The Day the Earth Stood Still),  playing Dr. Odo Warnoff who was sent to earth with several other of his alien cohorts.  The story is beyond laughable and involves an alien takeover by means of first using a bunch of pretty girls because human men are dumb, (or something), and then resurrecting as many classic movie monsters as they can to make clones of, (or something), to repopulate the Earth, (or something).  The fact that the cast takes it all rather seriously is actually kind of a bummer since the plot is so absurd that everyone going full schlock would have probably helped.  When characters are not standing around and being boring, it is agreeably fun, but boy is it stupid.

THE HANGING WOMAN
(1973)
Dir - José Luis Merino
Overall: GOOD

In typical Euro-horror fashion, The Hanging Woman got released under enough titles to ensure proper confusion, including La orgía de los muertos, (Orgy of the Dead, not to be further confused with the embarassingly stupid, Ed Wood scripted "film" of the same name), as well as Beyond the Living Dead, Return of the Zombies, and Terror of the Living Dead.  Paul Naschy for this one is reduced to a supporting yet equally memorable role as a cemetery caretaker with a low IQ.  The main story is ripe with silly plot holes, laughably written characters, and even a Saw-worthy twist montage at the end that is better than one would expect.  Director José Luis Merino, (who also co-scripted the movie with Enrico Colombo), keeps the pace quite brisk and wonderfully stages enough actually spooky visuals and set pieces throughout to qualify it as successfully macabre and eerie.  Enhancing some of the strangeness, the "hero" is a preposterous jackass who is quick to violence and shouting.  In the span of about twelve hours, he goes from boning his uncle's widow, (who is also a witch), to making a servant girl cry by having her undress in front of him, to proclaiming that he intends to propose to the latter since now they are in love.  Creepy zombies, black magic, and graveyards though so, yay!

CRIMSON
(1976)
Dir - Juan Fortuny
Overall: MEH

Essentially a rather poor, contemporary gangster film with a mad scientist scheme rather haphazardly thrown in, Crimson, (Las Ratas no Duermen de Noche, Rats Don't Sleep at Night, Crimson, the Color of Blood), is as unmemorable as any of Paul Naschy's non-supernatural horror movies ever got.  The actor is wasted throughout, only given a very little bit to do within the last several minutes.  Before that, he is left unconscious in various locations while criminals and ladies from rival gangs fuss over him and each other.  There are other nods to some of James Cagney's well-renowned gangster films, (White Heat particularly comes to mind), and one cannot help but think of Quintin Tarantino possibly making something interesting out of the plot here where a handful of goofy, somewhat morbid details occur and pretty much all the bad guys end up dead, (spoilers).  Director Juan Fortuny, (in his only time working with Naschy), cannot muster enough laughs or any suspense out of the proceedings though as everyone plays it too stiff and dull, plus the back and forth plot just lumbers along to its inevitable conclusion.  For the Naschy completest, there are two dubbed versions with the French one offering up a minimal amount of extra nudity, but otherwise you get the same idea with the English dub as well.